Best Tips for Better Sex: Actionable Advice That Works
TL;DR — Better sex comes down to a few practical habits: staying active, eating well, managing stress, and communicating openly with your partner. Simple changes like adding foreplay, using lubrication, and trying new experiences can make a real difference. Prioritising your overall health supports your sexual wellbeing — no gimmicks required.
Key takeaways
- Helpguide.org states that physical activity is first and foremost among the healthy behaviours that can improve your sexual functioning.
- Health.harvard.edu recommends using lubrication and doing something soothing together before sex, such as playing a game or going out for a nice dinner.
- The Gottman Institute emphasises that a couple's friendship is the real foreplay, forming the foundation of a satisfying intimate connection.
- WebMD suggests touching each other in new ways and trying different sex positions to discover what feels best.
- Ro.co highlights that starting with open communication about what you both want is a key takeaway for improving your sex life.
Better sex tips start with the basics: movement, nutrition, stress management, and honest conversation. You don't need fancy supplements or complicated routines to feel closer to your partner and enjoy more satisfying intimacy. Small, consistent changes to your daily habits create the foundation for a healthier, more connected sex life — and most of them cost nothing at all.
This guide pulls together practical, evidence-informed advice you can actually use. We'll cover exercise, food, stress relief, communication, foreplay, and a few ideas for keeping things fresh. Everything here comes from reputable health sources, and we'll flag where you might want to speak to a professional. Let's get started.
Move Your Body More Often
Physical activity is one of the most effective things you can do for your sex life. Helpguide.org puts it plainly: exercise is first and foremost among the healthy behaviours that can improve your sexual functioning. Regular movement boosts circulation, increases stamina, and helps you feel more confident in your own skin — all of which feed directly into better intimacy.
You don't need to become a gym obsessive. Aim for at least 150 minutes of moderate activity per week, which breaks down to roughly 30 minutes on most days. That could be brisk walking, cycling, swimming, or even a vigorous housework session. The point is consistency, not intensity. Strength training twice a week supports muscle tone and hormone balance too.
A simple weekly movement plan
Aim for five 30-minute sessions of moderate cardio — walking counts — plus two short strength sessions using bodyweight exercises or light weights. Add stretching or yoga once a week to improve flexibility and reduce tension. This isn't a performance programme; it's a maintenance plan for your body that pays dividends in the bedroom.
Eat for Energy and Blood Flow
What you eat affects how you feel, and that includes how you perform and respond during sex. GoodRx points to nutrition as a factor in sexual health, and the connection makes sense: foods that support heart health and circulation also support sexual function. Think colourful vegetables, oily fish, wholegrains, nuts, and seeds.
Certain nutrients deserve a mention. Nitrates in beetroot and leafy greens help blood vessels relax. Zinc in pumpkin seeds, lentils, and red meat supports hormone production. Omega-3 fats in salmon, mackerel, and walnuts reduce inflammation and improve blood flow. None of these are miracle foods, but eaten regularly they contribute to the machinery that makes sex feel good.
Foods worth adding this week
Try a handful of pumpkin seeds as a snack, add spinach to your smoothie or sandwich, and have oily fish twice a week. Swap white bread for wholegrain and snack on walnuts instead of crisps. These are supermarket swaps, not specialist purchases, and they support your body across the board.
Manage Your Stress Before It Manages Your Libido
Stress is one of the biggest quiet killers of desire. When you're wound up, your body produces cortisol, which actively suppresses sex hormones. Health.harvard.edu advises doing something soothing together before sex — playing a game, going out for a nice dinner — because relaxation isn't a luxury; it's a prerequisite.
Finding what works for you might take a bit of trial and error. Some people decompress with a hot bath, others with a walk, a podcast, or ten minutes of quiet breathing. The important thing is to build decompression into your day rather than hoping it'll happen by itself. If stress is persistent or overwhelming, speak to your GP — that's exactly the kind of situation where professional support makes a difference.
Quick stress-busting habits
Try a five-minute breathing exercise before bed: inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for six. Reduce caffeine after lunch. Put your phone in another room an hour before sleep. These aren't dramatic interventions, but they lower your baseline stress enough to make intimacy more appealing and more enjoyable.
Talk to Each Other — Actually Talk
Ro.co identifies open communication about what you both want as a key starting point for better sex. That sounds obvious, but plenty of couples avoid these conversations because they feel awkward or vulnerable. The reality is that your partner can't read your mind, and guessing usually leads to frustration on both sides.
Start small. You don't need to produce a wish list on the first conversation. A simple "I really liked when we…" or "Could we try…?" goes a long way. The Gottman Institute emphasises that a couple's friendship is the real foreplay — meaning the emotional connection you build day to day directly shapes your physical connection. Talk about your day, ask questions, listen properly. Intimacy starts long before the bedroom.
Conversation starters that aren't cheesy
Try asking your partner what their favourite part of your last time together was. Mention something you'd like more of. If face-to-face feels too intense, send a message during the day. The goal isn't a therapy session; it's just making space for honesty. If you're really stuck, resources like gottman.com offer structured approaches based on research with couples.
Prioritise Foreplay — Don't Skip It
WebMD advises playing around with foreplay and touching each other in new ways. Foreplay isn't a warm-up act; for many people it's the main event. Rushing past it is one of the most common reasons sex feels underwhelming, especially in long-term relationships where the routine can become predictable.
Health.harvard.edu suggests using lubrication as part of the experience. Lube reduces friction, increases comfort, and makes everything feel smoother — it's not a sign that something's wrong, it's a practical tool. Natural Cycles also highlights erotic roleplay, including dressing up or playing pretend, as a way to inject novelty. You don't need to go overboard; even small changes in the sequence or setting can shift the experience from routine to memorable.
Simple ways to extend foreplay
Set a timer for fifteen minutes and agree that's the minimum. Try a different room. Use massage oil and take turns. Read something aloud to each other. The point is to slow down and pay attention — to each other's bodies, reactions, and enjoyment. Foreplay is where curiosity lives, and curiosity keeps sex interesting.
Keep Things Fresh Without Overcomplicating It
Healthline suggests reigniting your dopamine with a fresh experience and scheduling a sex "fact-finding" night. Novelty doesn't have to mean anything extreme — it could be as simple as trying a different position, exploring a new part of the house, or setting aside an evening with no phones and no distractions. Forhims.co.uk also recommends incorporating toys and trying different positions as straightforward ways to mix things up.
The science behind this is straightforward: your brain responds to new stimuli with a release of dopamine, the same neurotransmitter tied to pleasure and motivation. When sex becomes entirely predictable, that response dulls. You're not bored with your partner; you're bored with the script. Changing even small details — timing, location, order of events — can reset that response.
Low-effort ideas to try this month
Cook a meal together with the lights dimmed. Take a shower together before bed. Pick a position you haven't tried in a while. Give each other a ten-minute massage with no expectation of it going further. These aren't revolutionary suggestions, but they interrupt autopilot, and that's exactly what keeps intimacy alive.
Support Your Sexual Health Through Daily Habits
GoodRx lists a range of practical daily habits that support sexual wellbeing: using lubricant, practising yoga, and staying on top of general health. Forhims.co.uk adds Kegel exercises to the list — these strengthen the pelvic floor, which can improve sensation and control for people of all genders. You can do them anywhere: simply contract the muscles you'd use to stop the flow of urine, hold for a few seconds, release, and repeat.
Sleep is another underrated factor. Poor sleep lowers testosterone, increases irritability, and saps the energy you need for intimacy. Aim for seven to nine hours per night, keep a consistent bedtime, and limit screens before bed. Hydration matters too — even mild dehydration can affect mood and physical performance.
A daily checklist for sexual health
Drink two litres of water. Do ten Kegels while waiting for the kettle. Walk for thirty minutes. Eat at least two portions of vegetables with dinner. Get to bed at a consistent time. None of these are specifically "sex tips," but together they create the conditions where good sex is much more likely to happen — and feel good when it does.

Frequently asked questions
What is the 3-3-3 rule for intimacy?
The 3-3-3 rule is a framework some couples use to build connection: three minutes of eye contact, three minutes of physical touch, and three minutes of conversation about desires or feelings. It's designed to slow things down and create intentional closeness. You don't need to follow it rigidly — the idea is to carve out focused time for each other without distractions.
What is the 72 hour intimacy rule?
The 72-hour intimacy rule suggests that couples should aim to reconnect physically — whether through sex, extended cuddling, or meaningful touch — within 72 hours of their last intimate encounter. The idea is to maintain momentum and closeness rather than letting long gaps erode desire. It's a guideline, not a strict deadline, and what matters most is that both partners feel connected.
What are the best ways to improve sex time?
Health.harvard.edu recommends reducing stress and doing something soothing before sex. GoodRx suggests practising yoga, which builds body awareness and control. Kegel exercises, mentioned by forhims.co.uk, strengthen the pelvic floor and can improve stamina. Pacing yourself, prioritising foreplay, and communicating with your partner about timing and rhythm all help. If you're consistently concerned, speak to your GP.
What are some tips for having the best sex?
Ro.co starts with open communication about what you both want. WebMD suggests trying different positions and touching each other in new ways. Health.harvard.edu recommends using lubrication and relaxing before sex. The Gottman Institute says your friendship with your partner is the real foundation. Combine these: talk honestly, stay curious, slow down, and pay attention to what actually feels good rather than what you think should.
Is sex good for your body?
Regular sexual activity can contribute to physical health in several ways. It raises your heart rate, counts as light to moderate exercise, and may help with sleep thanks to the release of oxytocin and prolactin. Helpguide.org notes that physical activity supports sexual functioning, and the reverse is also true — an active sex life can support overall wellbeing. If you have specific health concerns, check with your GP.
What foods help with sexual performance?
GoodRx links nutrition to sexual health. Foods that support circulation and hormone balance are a good place to start: oily fish like salmon for omega-3 fats, leafy greens and beetroot for nitrates that help blood vessels relax, and pumpkin seeds or lentils for zinc. These aren't instant fixes, but eaten consistently as part of a balanced diet, they support the systems involved in arousal and performance.
The bottom line
Better sex isn't about a single trick or supplement — it's about stacking small, sustainable habits that support your body, your mood, and your relationship. Move regularly, eat food that feeds your circulation, manage your stress, and talk to your partner like they're your favourite person — because they are. Use lubrication when it helps, prioritise foreplay, and don't be afraid to shake up the routine when things feel stale.
Here's what I'd do today: pick one thing from this list and actually do it. Send your partner a message telling them something you enjoyed about your last time together. Go for a thirty-minute walk. Add spinach to your dinner. Buy a bottle of lubricant. The best sex advice isn't complicated — it's just about starting.